Incident Reports

Incident Report DCC-IRF-S7K2 — Signs Instructing Citizens to Keep Dogs Under Control

The Department of Citizen Complaints has received a complaint about signs instructing Citizens to keep dogs under control. The signs do not define control. The matter has been referred to the Department of Terminology. The sign will still be there during this process.

Incident Report DCA-IRF-3P9W — Fox Excrement Application

The Department of Chemical Affairs examines fox excrement application specifically. Why it is different from other organic matter. Why prevention is the only effective strategy. Why the dog will always find it first. Only one party requires a bath.

Urgent Incident Report SCEC-IRF-E002 — Frenetic Random Activity Period (The Zoomies)

The Sub-Committee on Emerging Concerns has received another report of a Frenetic Random Activity Period. The Sub-Committee notes it keeps receiving this report. The Sub-Committee notes the event is not an emerging concern. The Sub-Committee notes the lamp situation varies by household.

Noose Terminology Complaint

A complaint has been received objecting to the use of the word noose. The complainant accurately described the mechanism of a noose and then objected to the word. The Bureau has logged the incident.

Incident Report - Wilful Puddle Entry

The Department of Environmental Management investigates wilful puddle entry. The dog entered every puddle on the route. The dog was on a lead at the time. The Department notes the lead was the Citizen's idea.

Incident Report - Rolling in Decomposing Matter

The Department of Chemical Affairs investigates why dogs roll in decomposing matter. The evidence is inconclusive. The dog appears unconcerned by this. The dog has no regrets. The Citizen has several.